Published June 29, 2011 07:18
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TURN YOUR NEGATIVE CRITIC INTO YOUR POSITIVE COACH
Paddy Cloete (Psychologist and Ironman)
paddycloete@mweb.co.za
082 413 6649; (041) 581 1318
Golfer Rory McIlroy had one of the worst days of his golfing career in April this year. He shot a final round 80 at the Masters and blew a six-stroke final round lead. Two months later at the US Open McIlroy broke the course record and won the tournament in convincing fashion.
McIlroy’s experience at the Masters COULD have destroyed his confidence, but it did not. Instead, McIlroy turned it into a character-building experience, which is a great lesson to all sportsmen and –women. In the press conference following his defeat at the Masters McIlroy had the following to say:
“You know, it’s going to be hard to take for a few days, but I’ll get over it. I’m fine …. This is my first experience at it, and hopefully the next time I’m in this position, I’ll be able to handle it a little better. I didn’t handle it particularly well today obviously, but it was a character-building day, put it this way. I’ll come out stronger for it.
“I’ve got to take the positives, and the positives were I led this golf tournament for 63 holes … I’ll have plenty more chances. I know that” (Cohn & Cohn, 2011).
McIlroy succeeded in learning from this experience which was clearly evident when he won the US Open two months later. In the press conference following his win McIlroy stated:
“I needed to be a little more cocky, a little more arrogant on the golf course, and think a little bit more about myself, which I’ve tried to incorporate a bit, just on the golf course.
You have to go out there, work hard, and believe in yourself. As long as you believe in yourself and believe that you’re doing the right things, that’s all you can do” (Cohn & Cohn, 2011).
The difference between McIlroy’s defeat and victory was that he turned his negative critic into his positive coach. We all have conversations with ourselves. Every athlete hears two competing voices – a negative critic and a positive coach. The negative critic encourages you to focus on what COULD go wrong and on what NOT to do. Your critic makes you dwell on your past mistakes and encourages you to compete with the mindset of avoiding making mistakes. This destroys your confidence which is reflected in your performance.
The other voice in your head is your positive coach. Your positive coach is your powerful ally, because he offers and reinforces positive thought. Positive thoughts translate into positive actions. Actions become habits. Habits become character. Character becomes destiny. This is why Bobby Jones, the only golfer credited with a single-season Grand Slam, said that “competitive golf is played on a five-and-a-half-inch course: the space between your ears”. Jones’s words ring true for all sports and in fact, all of life’s challenges. We will always have the negative critic and the positive coach competing for airtime in our head. Which voice you listen to is a matter of choice. The more you choose to listen to the positive coach, the quieter the negative critic will become and the more successful you will be. Arnold Palmer, one of the most successful golfers of all times, kept the following saying in his locker to remind him of this important truth:
“If you think you are beaten, you are
If you think you dare not, you don’t
If you’d like to win, but you think you can’t,
It is almost certain you won’t.
If you think you’ll lose, you’ve lost
For out in the world you’ll find
Success begins with a fellow’s will.
It’s all a state of the mind.
Life’s battles don’t always go
To the stronger or faster man;
But sooner or later the man who wins
Is the man who thinks he can.”
In life and in sport, whether it be golf or triathlon, we need to keep reminding ourselves that we have a choice of which voice we listen to. May you always turn the positive coach up to full volume and may you mute the negative critic!
Recognition to Cohn & Cohn (June & July 2011) and Mack (2001)
